Global Warming Data

I have developed a new way to detect changes in our global climate. I think this datapoint may be the perfect way to track and manage changes to our climate without having to pay for sending IceBreaker ships deep into the sub-arctic sea ice.

I call it the SDI or Shirtless Dude Index.

As many of you know, one of the lovely things about our fair city is the weather. It only rains between December and March, and the temperature runs between 50 and 68, pretty much year round*.

We have two summers a year and they are never during summer. We have a spring summer and a fall summer. They are the times when our weather behaves like what summer is in other places, i.g. 80 degrees and sunny. We are now in the middle of our spring summer. When this happens it does two things:

1. everyone clogs up the beaches

2. people put on their 2 or 3 “summer” outfits**

This year I feel like we’ve had more summers than we usually get. So this weekend when I went for a run on Saturday I decided that I needed some type of measurement for this. Thus the SDI.

No one ever goes shirtless in San Francisco unless they are either

1. a crazy homeless man (zany musical spaceships…give me a dollar)

2. one of the weird middle age nudists out at Baker Beach who spend all day naked and for some reason, in a superman stance***

So if I count the number of shirtless dudes I see during the day ****. I should be able to get an accurate Idea of how much we’ve been affected by Global warming.

Saturday SDI: 16 (including the baseball game which may skew results)

Sunday SDI: 6 (including Ocean beach which may skew results)

Today SDI: 2 (thus far)

*Except for (like right now) we get 3 days of 80 degree days or (worse) 90 degree days in spring and fall.

** For me this means it’s the one time a year when I veer from my normal work clothes which are always Button down shirt, grey t-shirt and jeans. Today I’m wearing a *short sleeve* button down and khakis (I know! It’s a huge leap!)

*** legs spread, chest out, hands on hips

**** excluding the Castro, for obvious reasons

One Response to “Global Warming Data”

  1. elseano Says:

    Kudos Dave,

    As one that may oft be counted in the SDI, I applaud your scientific research.

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